Hard to Forget
by scolli20
Summary: In Hard to Forget, a stranger attacks Michaela. Will Sully be able to save her from her own inner demons? How will it affect her relationship with Sully and their upcoming marriage?
1. Chapter 1

** Hard to Forget**

_Summary: In Hard to__ Forget_, a stranger attacks Michaela. Will Sully be able to save her from her own inner demons? How will it affect her relationship with Sully and their upcoming marriage?

_Author's Note: This is just a small fic I wrote after reading many similar scenarios to which Michaela wasn't forced to deal with the incident emotionally in the way I had hoped to read about. I've never ever written any fan fiction or anything I would consider "good" fiction writing, but hopefully you will still enjoy it. Remember I'm no writer, but I would still love to hear any comments. _

_Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or names of characters. Both are property of the creators of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, Beth Sullivan, and the CBS network. _

_Ch.1_

It was a beautiful spring afternoon, and Michaela had just finished cleaning up the clinic. It was only three-o'clock, and she was thoroughly glad to be finishing early for a change. She looked down at her left hand, smiling at the ring gleaming in the sun._ In a week we will be married._ She wondered how things would change. Hopefully, it would be for the better. In fact she was planning on that, but it was change just the same.

Suddenly she heard a knock at the door. "Come in," she replied.

Emma appeared in front of her frantically stating, " Dr. Mike you got to come quick one of the girls at the saloon has been attacked."

"I'm coming," she replied grabbing her medical bag and following Emma across the street and into the saloon.

"Fancy seeing you in here again, Michaela," Hank declared.

"Hank I don't have time for this, someone is hurt," she replied barely acknowledging his comment.

"I'm surprised you have no knowledge of this," she quickly stated as she made her way to the back of the saloon.

Hank looked over to Emma. "What's she talkin' about? "

"It's Amanda. Somebody attacked her," Emma answered.

Hank quickly emerged from behind the counter and followed Michaela and Emma back to Amanda's room.

"I went into her room about five minutes ago, and she was bleeding pretty badly," Emma explained to Hank.

Hank had the look of pure fury in his eyes. "Who did this to her?" he stated his voice laced with hatred "Why didn't she come to me?" he turned to Emma.

"She's too scared. She won't even tell us who did it. Said he didn't pay for her neither. Said he wanted her and was going to have her. She was so scared he would hurt her again. She wouldn't tell us nothin' other than to get Dr. Mike," she responded.

"She goin' to be all right?" he questioned. Michaela could hear genuine concern in his voice.

"Yes, Hank she's going to be fine. She's got some serious bruises on her wrists, but the cut on her arm is very superficial. It won't need more than a few stitches," she calmly explained. As Michaela tended to Amanda, Hank turned and said, "Amanda I need to know who did this to ya. I can't kill him if ya don't tell me who to shoot," he explained trying to suppress the fury in his voice.

"I can't…." she stuttered. "He will kill me. Hank, he will," she cried.

"No, I will kill him first," he responded.

"But what if you don't get ta him 'fore he gets to me? I can't take that chance. I ain't telling ya Hank," she spoke with tears running down her cheeks.

He quickly stormed out of her room in a fury. Michaela could hear his screams coming from the other room.

"I mean it who did this? Somebody attacked one of my girls. Thought they could have their way with her without paying! It was one of you, and I want to know who," he screamed. He picked up a glass and threw it against the back wall.

"Damnit! When I find out who it was, I'm going to kill them ya hear? Reward for any one that comes forward knowing anything on that jackass. You all hear that?" he yelled still in a rage.

"There. You're going to be just fine Amanda," Michaela soothingly declared.

"Thanks. I'm still just real shaken up," she replied.

"I bet. You stay in bed and rest," Michaela empathetically stated. She walked toward the front of the saloon, and as she was leaving she caught the eye of a dark haired man in a black hat. He fixed her with this white-hot stare that seemed to radiate through her. It gave her chills, and she quickly left the saloon and crossed the street.

"Sully!" she exclaimed as he approached the clinic.

"Hey! How ya been?" he responded as he embraced her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"I was just at Hanks. Another one of his girls was attacked," Michaela shared.

"She gonna be okay?" he questioned in shock.

"Yeah, she's going to be fine. She's more scared than anything," she replied.

"Glad to hear that's she's alright. You almost finished at the clinic?" he wanted to know.

"Yes. I was on my way out when Emma came over to get me. I'll be done in about fifteen minutes. You are still coming over for dinner tonight aren't you?" she asked.

"Yeah, was planning on it," he grinned as he placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"Good. I'll look forward to it."

"Ma! Ma!" Brian exclaimed as he raced over to her.

"Yes, Brian what is it?" she answered.

"Ma, can Colleen and me stay after school and practice our lines for the play next Sunday? " he wanted to know.

" Colleen and I, Brian. And well I actually wanted to get home and start dinner. Sully is coming over tonight…" she replied hesitantly.

"Please, Ma I really need the practice," he wined.

"Well I guess I could find some work to do at the clinic until you are finished, " she tentatively explained.

She had been hoping to get home early this afternoon and lay down for a while. With all the planning for the wedding the last few weeks, she was exhausted._ So much for that plan._

Sully quickly jumped in. " Michaela, you can still head home. I'll bring the children back. I got some business in town, and I was coming over tonight anyways."

"Well I don't know… " she uncertainly replied.

"Leave the wagon here and take one of Robert E's horses back to your place. I'll come by tomorrow morning and ride it back to town…" he stated.

She quickly cut him off, "I don't know Sully…"

"It's really no trouble at all. Ya look completely exhausted. Please just go home," he pleaded with her.

" Aww, come on ma! Sully will bring us home," Brian jumped in hoping to convince her.

"Okay, I guess I don't have a choice," she hesitantly replied.

"Yay! See you tonight ma," he replied with joy as he took of towards the schoolhouse.

"Bye Brian. Have fun!" she called out after him.

She looked up at Sully, "Thank you. How am I ever going to repay you?" she teasingly questioned.

He pulled her close again, kissing her with more passion than before. "I can think of a couple of ways…" he smiled as he spoke.

"Sully!" she exclaimed as her face turned a bright shade of red.

He loved when she was embarrassed over something he said. He laughed replying, "Come on, let's see about getting you a horse." They both headed towards Robert E's hand in hand.


	2. Chapter 2

**Ch.2 **

As Sully sat on the steps of the clinic, he decided to go to Grace's for some pie. _The kids won't be finished for a while now. I've got some time to kill._ He had told Michaela he had business in town, but the truth of the matter was he had nothing whatsoever to do. He knew she would never have agreed if she thought he was doing it merely to help her. As he was headed over to Grace's, he spotted a man leaving the saloon. The man's gaze was fixed on the dirt road leading out of town.

_What's he looking at? Something about that gaze don't feel right. _He couldn't place exactly what it was. This man's look just bothered him. As he was deep in thought, the man jumped on his horse and road out of town. Sully quickly shook himself out of his thoughts, and he continued on to Grace's determined to keep an eye on that stranger.

As he began walking, Hank emerged from the saloon his gaze fixed on the road out of town as well. "Hank, what are you looking at?" Sully questioned aloud.

"What's it to ya?" He bitterly replied.

"Nothin. Just wonderin' if you knew anything about that stranger that just left town? His gaze was fixed in the same place as yours," he explained.

"Don't know nothin' more than you. Even if I did I wouldn't tell you" he sneered.

"Why do you ask anyways?" he gruffly questioned.

"I don't know. I just get a bad feeling from him is all," Sully answered.

"Oh, a bad feeling huh? I forgot you are Mr. hero. Haven't saved the day in a while have we? Lookin' for someone to save again?" he mocked.

"Nevermind. I'm just going to keep an eye on him and I suggest you do the same." Sully left continuing on through town.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ch.3**

Michaela approached the homestead grateful to be home for the day. She quickly put Robert E.'s horse in the stable alongside Flash and retreated into the homestead. She began to pick up a few things the children had left on the table at breakfast, and began setting it for dinner. Her thoughts quickly drifted to Sully. _Sully. It was so nice of him to offer to bring the children home. He really is extremely thoughtful_. Her mind quickly drifted to the kiss he had given her after she had thanked him. Her face turned red as her mind quickly thought of the weeks ahead and how many more of those kisses there were likely to be.

"Matthew.." Michaela uttered as she heard footsteps approaching the front door. The door crashed open revealing a man Michaela had never seen before.

"Who are you? What do you wa..?" Before the "want" could escape from her lips, he had grabbed her pulling her towards him. In one shift motion, he turned her around so that her back was to his chest. She could feel the cold, solid steal blade against her neck.

"You know exactly what I want. And I'm sure if you think hard enough, you will know who I am too. Remember I saw ya this afternoon? In fact I've been seein' ya for the last three days from my window. Walkin' into your clinic every mornin'. That beautiful long hair of yours blowing in the wind… That look of determination on your face. Those gorgeous eyes a yours and that body… I knew I had ta have ya. And I_ always_ get what I want. " The dark haired stranger replied.

"What do you mean?" Michaela spoke fear quickly rising inside of her.

"You know exactly what I mean. I want _you_," he replied.

She felt his hand grab her between the thighs. _Even sully has never touched me there._ She felt white-hot panic radiate from the pit of her stomach. _Please, please don't let him do this. _

"You won't be the first engaged woman I've ever had." He uttered in a dark voice, his hand touching the ring on her left finger. "And you definitely won't be the last."

"Please, no, I'll do anything," Michaela stated, and as she did so she heard the words echo through the homestead as the stranger spoke the same five words.

"They all say the same thing. There's nothin' ya can do. I know what I want, and I'm going to get it and there's nothin' you can do about it. Screamin' won't make no difference. You know as well as me that we are out in the middle a nowhere. No one's goin ta hear ya, " he bitterly spoke.

"My son's going…" Michaela began, but he cut her off immediately.

"Yeah, your son Matthew right? Going ta be home any second? No, he's not. He's staying in town tonight ta have dinner with that immigrant. And ya fiancée, that Sully fella is staying in town with your other two children for at least another couple a hours. Don't ya think I know what I'm doin'? I told ya I've done this before. Ain't nobody here ta save ya. If you struggle I_ will_ kill you. I have done it before, and I can do it again." The stranger stated. He quickly shoved her to the ground, and pinned her to the floor. Never once removing the blade from her throat.

There was no doubt in Michaela's mind that he was telling the truth. She knew by the feeling of the steal blade against her throat that he knew_ exactly_ where to hold it. This was no mere threat. One small move by the victim would be fatal. It was more than clear that he had done this before.

_I have to buy some time. Maybe, just maybe Sully and the children will be home early. Or there will be an emergency in town and someone will come out here to get me. I have to keep him talking._

"How do you know all of that?" she spoke hoping to distract him.

"What's it to ya?" he replied quickly.

"I'm just wondering why my life is so interesting to you. You seem to know so much. Is it maybe because I meant more to you than all the others? Maybe this time it will mean something a little more?" she spoke hoping he would fall into her verbal trap.

"I don't know what ya are talking about. I just know a fine woman when I see one. A women too good for a saloon, but one that would be more than worth the effort to have in bed." He retorted.

"So that's where I saw you today? The saloon, then?" she quickly replied.

_It was all coming back to her. The strange man with that white-hot stare that had seemed to radiate through her…It was him…_

"Yeah. Now no more talking. I mean it. Ya know I will kill you. And I can tell by your eyes that ya know I speak the truth," his words shot out in an angry reply.

She was out of options. There wasn't a lot left to say. She knew his patience wouldn't hold much longer. _There is one other option._ She wanted to throw up. The idea made her so nauseous she couldn't think straight. She had no idea how she could even think of doing this.

_What would Sully think? Sully. Oh god I wish he could hear my pain. I wish he could sense my pain. He did it before with the dog soldiers. Oh please Sully. Please, please hear me begging for you and forgive me for what I'm about to do. I'm sorry, but I have to try and stop him, and this is the only way. _

"Can I just say one more thing?" she spoke in almost a whisper.

"Yeah. Fine. What is it? That they will catch me? That I will pay for this? Cause you are wrong. They won't," he answered.

"No, that's not what I was going to say," she retorted. She brought her left hand up to cup his cheek.

"I was just going to tell you that I'm ashamed to admit that I find you very attractive," she spoke quickly regretting the words in her heart as soon as they left her lips.

Wow, this was new. This he had never actually heard before. "Attractive huh?" he answered clearly intrigued.

"Yes, attractive," she said trying to sound convincing.

"Show me then." And he bent down and kissed her with more force then she had ever felt from a man's kiss before. He begged for entrance into her mouth.

_I have to unclench my teeth as hard as this is. If the kissing is exciting maybe that will buy more time… I have to slow this down any way possible._ So, she let his tongue roam her mouth as she began to feel incredibly nauseous.

_This is awful. I have never felt so wrong, or so ashamed. But I know that if I push him away this will all be over, and I will wish that I had at least tried to delay the inevitable. _

He quickly pulled back from her lips. He began to place hot kisses down her neck and across her jaw. "Hum, maybe I made a mistake with you. Maybe you do feel something for me. Maybe just sexual attraction, but that's still something," he spoke as he began to slow caress her breast.

_Maybe if I could just get him to put the knife down even for a minute…._

"You don't need that knife you know," she whispered in his ear.

"I don't, do I? ", he questioned.

"No. I want you. With or without that knife, you can have me..," she responded.

He gave it a moment's thought. _This would be much easier if I had both hands free to explore her body. No, I know better than that. Even if she does want me, she's still got that band on her finger and without this knife I've got no power._

"Well, even if I don't need it I'm goin ta enjoy using it," he said.

_Great that didn't work. Maybe if I can get him to kiss me again…._

"Kiss me!" she exclaimed. _Just picture him as Sully. I know this is so hard and he's not Sully, but you can't let him take you. You just can't. Whatever it takes._

He began to unbutton her shirt and panic immediately set in. _Oh, god this is not slowing down at all._ She began to feel helpless and out of control.

_"He's right you know. Sully and the children won't be back for hours, and by then it will be too late," a nagging voice in the back of her head spoke out. _

Once he had undone all the buttons of her shirt, he quickly removed it from her arms with only the one free hand.

_Michaela you can see that he wasn't lying. He's done this before. Many times. He's going to get exactly what he wants. He's going to have you, and there's nothing you can do now. Even betraying Sully didn't stop the inevitable, and he had to have known that all along. _

She pulled her lips swiftly away from his "I can't please stop please…" she begged.

_Please let there be an ounce of compassion in him_. A hot tear began leaking down her face as her panic grew with each passing second. Her heart was about to beat out of her chest, and her breathing grew more rapid by the second.

He swiftly removed his shirt and pulled a second knife from his belt. She felt the blade against her chest, and she prayed to god that he wouldn't kill her. She wanted to kick him. Run. But she knew from all of her medical training that this would be impossible. If she moved at all, he could kill her with one swift movement. Sully and the children would find her body in a pool of blood upon arrival. Dead. No, she couldn't let that happen. And for some reason she really believed that if she cooperated, he wouldn't kill her. She didn't know why, but she felt that deep inside. Even if she was just kidding herself, at least this way there was a chance for survival. If she fought back, there was no chance at all.

He slashed through the thin fabric of her camisole, leaving nothing between his eyes and her chest. The tears began to fall more swiftly as her cheeks turned red. _Even Sully has never seen me like this. I hate the way he's looking at me with such desire… such lus_t…

He began to caress her upper body and pressed his lips to hers once again. This time, however, she refused to reciprocate at all. She wasn't going to make this easy on him. Stalling didn't work, so she wasn't going to make this experience any more pleasurable for him.

His hand rapidly stopped the assault on her upper body, moving down to the clasp of her skirt. Like her shirt, he unbuttoned it quickly. He removed it, leaving nothing between his eyes and her being other than a pair of bloomers. He unbuckled his pants enough to expose himself to her, as he moved his hand across her stomach and down the waistband of her only remaining item of clothing.

_Oh, god. No, please don't let him do this. Please Sully. I need you more than I've ever needed you before_.

She began to cry out to him to stop in a panicked anguish, but he had heard it all before with the first woman. It had been hard to ignore, but by now he could easily drowned out the painful cries. They meant nothing more to him that a bird's call or the sound of a stream running down the mountain. She felt his hand brush against her inner thigh, as he began to slide off her last piece of clothing. But that wasn't what alarmed her most; it was the feeling of him. _Hard against her thigh_. The unbelievable panic she felt began to rise inside of her in a way she had never felt before. Never had she felt so overcome with fear and anxiety. Not even when One Eye had tried to do the very same. It had been different; she had known then that Sully would save her. This time, though, she wasn't so lucky.

_I should have given myself to him when I had the chance. Now he will never want me again._ She closed her eyes and braced herself for what she knew was coming. Her body tensed, as he was about to enter her….


	4. Chapter 4

**Ch.4**

He felt her. He could hear her calling to him… in fear… and in pain. _Sully please, please hear me…_ Sully saw Robert E approaching the café, and he quickly ran over to him.

"Robert E!" he turned glancing at his friend. Then, he turned making eye contact with Grace. "I need ya both to watch Brian and Colleen. They're at the school practin' lines for the play. They said they'd be done in about half an hour. I'll come back and get them when I'm done. I got something I got to take care of now," he spoke quickly his words running together in one long sentence.

Robert E., hearing the urgency in his friend's voice, didn't question Sully further. Grace however began to, "What's goin on? What's wrong?"

"I can't explain now, Grace. I've got to get to the homestead. Just watch the children, please? Robert E, can I borrow a horse?" he exclaimed in a rush.

"Yeah, you bet Sully," his friend replied a look of deep concern in his eyes.

In a flash Sully had mounted a horse and was quickly riding out of town. Hank saw him riding away and quickly shouted, "Hey where's he going?"

He threw down his cigar, mounted his horse and quickly followed the dirt trail out of town. Moments later he caught up to Sully, shouting at him to slow down.

"I don't have time for this. I got ta get to her," he shouted.

Hank persisted riding along beside him.

"What do you want?" he slowed down somewhat but still kept his horse at a steady pace.

"I want to know where you are going in such a hurry that's what," Hank shouted.

"I'm going to the homestead," he angrily replied.

"Why in such a hurry?" Hank demanded.

"I can't explain it. I just know that Michaela's in trouble..," he replied clearly frustrated with Hank's questioning.

"This got anything to do with that fella staying at the saloon?" Hank wondered aloud.

"I don't have any idea Hank. Is that why ya came along?" Sully asked.

"Partly. And partly cause I didn't want you getting to be the hero again and all," he explained.

"Well I'm not slowing down for you, so ya had better catch up." He left Hank in the dust quickly urging his horse to speed up.


	5. Chapter 5

**Ch.5**

Suddenly, she heard the door slam open. She heard his voice, "Michaela!" _No, it can't be. It's a dream. He doesn't even know I'm in trouble, why would he? He couldn't be back this early_. She felt the strangers body leave her own, but she still couldn't open her eyes. She couldn't believe it. _What if it wasn't true? What if it was just her mind playing tricks on her?_

Quickly she opened her eyes to see Sully lunge at her attacker with his tomahawk at the ready. But her attacker quickly ducked, and he ran out the side door. Sully was about to take off after him, when they heard Hank's voice bellow through the front door. "I'll get him Sully…" Hank quickly rode after the man determined to catch him.

Sully quickly ran to her side. She could no longer control her crying now that the knife wasn't pressing against her throat. The chocking sobs came out so forcefully that she could hardly breath. Sully realized right away the state she was in, and left her side only momentarily to return with a blanket to wrap around her.

"Oh, Michaela, I'm so sorry. I knew something wasn't right. I did get here in time didn't I?" He wasn't sure if she could answer, or if he even wanted to hear it. But he had to know.

"Yes…"

He could barely hear it. But it was still there. _Oh, god how close I came to loosing her. He would have killed her._ He quickly pulled her into his arms.

"It's okay. It's okay," he spoke over and over soothingly.

Suddenly, they heard a gunshot ring through the woods. "I got him!" they heard Hank bellow.

"It's all over now," he whispered. He tried to comfort her with words, but he knew what she really needed was just his strength, to feel his arms around her. So, he held her as she cried uncontrollably and shaking fitfully. He wished more than anything that he could have prevented this, and he wanted so badly to take her pain away.

* * *

The next evening they both stood out on the porch. The children were inside playing checkers paying no attention to Michaela or Sully. He hadn't been alone with her for more than five minutes since he left the night before. Robert E. and Grace had sent Colleen and Brian home with Matthew after Sully didn't return. After making sure Matthew and Colleen knew what had taken place and would watch after her, he left knowing that she probably needed some space to cope. He had met her at the clinic that afternoon and he still remembered their icy conversation…

"_Michaela, Came by to see how you were doin'. If there was anything I could do for you."_

"_I'm fine, why wouldn't I be? And no there's nothing you can do for me."_

"_Michaela, ya can't pretend it didn't happen" He grabbed her and pulled her towards him. "Ya have to deal with what happened or ya can't move past it."_

_She quickly pulled away. "I don't want to talk about that. Do you want to come to dinner tonight? _

_Her tone was snappy, and he knew she had asked more out of obligation that actually wanting him there. "Course I want to. And in a week here we will be having dinner together every night." He pulled her in once more placing a kiss on her lips. _

_She pulled away from him quicker than before and glared back at him. "Yeah. I guess. I have a lot of work that needs to be done, so I'll see you tonight." She held the door open for him looking back with an angry glance. _

"_Yeah. Okay then. Tonight." He replied. He wanted to kiss her goodbye, but after her forceful reaction he thought better of it and slowly walked out. _

Dinner had been very awkward. Michaela refused to make any eye contact with him at all, and she made it painfully clear to all at the table that she didn't wish to discuss anything regarding the wedding, honeymoon, or the new homestead. He knew they needed to talk, but he was never very good at bringing up conversations like this. _It has to be about the attack yesterday. She was fine and excited about everything until then. I just hope that she's willing to talk. She certainly didn't want to discuss it this afternoon. _

"Sully, " she spoke quickly pulling him from his own thoughts. "I have to tell you something…"

"I'm listening," he quickly replied.

"I don't know how to… or where to begin… but I feel that you have to know… before the wedding…"

_He didn't like were this was heading… _

"If you don't love me anymore… I guess…" the tears began to fall from her beautiful multicolored eyes once again. "I guess… I'll understand…I just I..." she stuttered chocking on the words.

"Michaela," he wrapped his arms around her, and she quickly pulled away once again.

"No. You need to hear this, and I don't think you will want to…to be doing that…when I tell you…" she sobbed.

He had no idea what she was talking about. _Why wouldn't I want to be holdin' my fiancée when she tells me whatever it is that is breakin' her heart?_

"Michaela…" he responded once again reaching out for her.

"No. Please just let me get this out…the night of the attack…Last night…I just... Well I… I did some things I shouldn't have… things I'm ashamed of... at the time I thought it was right…" she cried almost unable to continue.

"Now I know I was simply kidding myself… I betrayed you Sully… I just I don't know how to even begin…"

She was starting to scare him. _Betray me? How could she betray me? _He didn't like where this was headed. _Betray_. _It was such a dirty word, and she was so upset._

"I told him that I… I found him attractive. I kissed him, Sully. The way I kiss you. I told him to kiss me... I kissed back… I'm just so so sorry…" The words felt like acid coming from her mouth.

_That's it. Now he knows the truth and it's over. Over for good._ She looked down at the ring on her finger, though foggy through her tear stained eyes. She knew as beautiful as it was, and as much as she loved it and what it symbolized, she could no longer keep it. She began to remove it from her finger when Sully exclaimed,

"Hey, what are ya doin?" he quickly grabbed her right hand.

"Giving this back to you…" she stammered.

"No. Stop. I don't' want it back. Why would I want it back?" he questioned completely confused.

"Because you don't want to marry me anymore…" she hung her head in shame.

"Why would ya say that? Of course I want ta marry ya. Why wouldn't I?" he asked.

"Didn't you just hear me Sully? I kissed another man a week before our wedding! Passionately kissed him the way I kiss you…" she cried in frustration. _Why wasn't he upset?_

"I heard ya Michaela. Now answer a question for me. Why did ya do it? Why did ya kiss him like that? Tell him ya thought he was attractive? Why?" he questioned still no anger in his eyes at all.

"Because I thought that if he found the kissing, well... exciting, that he might slow down… slow down enough to bide me a little more time…time to come up with a plan to stop him, " she explained.

"Did ya just hear what came from your lips? Ya did it to save yourself. Ya did it to stop him from hurting ya. Ya did it to keep yourself safe, and it worked Michaela. It worked. Ya don't got to feel ashamed about that. Ya did it because you are strong and smart and wanted to try anything ta stop him, I get it. Ya didn't do it cause ya love him or even like him. Michaela, I don't hold nothin' against ya. I'm so glad ya told me, but like I said I don't hold it against ya. Can I hold ya now?" he questioned. She nodded.

"I don't deserve you," she whispered.

"And I don't deserve you," he replied smiling down at her.

"Can I ask you something?" she wanted to know.

"Anything," he answered.

"How did you know?" she looked deep into his blue eyes as she spoke.

"Know you needed me?" he finished.

"Well yes…" she responded.

"I felt ya. Felt ya callin' to me. Don't know how or why but I knew I needed to see if you were all right," he gazed down at her loving her more than ever.

"Thank you," she whispered in his ear.

"For what?" he wondered aloud.

"For saving my life," she explained.

"You don't have to thank me for that," he replied a little shocked.

"Thank you for listening to my heart," she explained further.

"Well, you always listen to mine." He smiled down at her. "I love ya and I can't wait ta marry ya. That is if you will still have me," he playfully asked.

She smiled back up at him eyes glistening. "Of course, and I love you too."

He pulled her closer, her head resting against his chest as they looked out into the night sky.


	6. Chapter 6

**Ch.6**

The days until their wedding passed quickly and were mostly uneventful. Sully overheard Hank informing the town of his daring rescue of Michaela. Luckily, Hank never entered the homestead, and he knew none of the details of the true attack. All he knew was what Sully told him, which was that the stranger had broken into Michaela's house and tried to kill her. Sully was very glad to have dodged a bullet there. He knew Michaela would be mortified if the whole town knew the details. After Hank had described the stranger he had killed, Amanda later identified him as her attacker. Hank was thrilled to add more details to his "daring" story, telling everyone in town what a dangerous threat he had eliminated.

* * *

The wedding was everything Michaela had dreamed about since she was a little girl. Sully, the town, her sisters, and even her mother were excited and thrilled. She decided from the beginning that she wasn't going to let anyone take that excitement away from them or herself. As enjoyable as the wedding and the reception were, she still couldn't shake the worry that lay deep inside of her. She did her best to keep her fear hidden inside, but a few times Sully glanced her way and looked deep into her eyes. It was as if he was trying to tell her he understood and would be there for her.

As they waved goodbye to their family and friends and boarded the train, she knew she couldn't deny it anymore. The fear was growing deep inside, and soon they would be alone. _Alone. _That word terrified her, and she really couldn't understand why. After all she had know this was part of the wedding from the start. Why did it scare her so much now?

Sully swiftly shut the door and wrapped his arms around her waist. He began to softly kiss her. He looked deep into her eyes as he picked her up in his arms carrying her over to the bed. He touched his lips to hers again, deepening the kiss by the second. His arm wrapped around her waist pulling her in close to him. His lips left hers momentarily as he began to place hot kisses along her jaw line. As his kisses caressed her face, his hands began to unlace her dress.

"Sully, it isn't even dark yet…" she nervously exclaimed.

He quickly turned to face her looking deep into her eyes as he stepped back towards the window. He began to slowly lower one of the shades stating, "But it's getting darker…" He lowered the shade to his left in a similar fashion with a short, "And darker…" She started to blush profusely, avoiding his eyes.

He returned to her side, slowly lifting her chin up to meet his gaze. Their lips touched again in passion as his hands began to caress her back. He pulled away and walked towards the very last shade, "And darker…" he stated again.

She looked up at him with longing in her eyes. She reached out and caressed his cheek and kissed him with more fire, more passion than she ever had. He begged for entrance into her mouth, which she quickly granted. With their heated kisses spurring them on, he slowly lowered Michaela down onto the bed. He pulled his lips away from hers, as he began to place kisses down her neck. He heard her moan in pleasure, and he couldn't help but smile. _This is finally going to happen. I'm finally going to be with the woman I love, body and soul. _He could feel the excitement and anticipation building inside of him.

She had been scared when they entered the train. She had felt the fear rising inside of her, but when he kissed her she quickly forgot all about it. _I've never felt such… such… _She couldn't put her finger on it exactly, but she had never felt this way before. It was exciting, yet terrifying at the same time.

As he pulled down the last shade and joined her once again, she had completely forgotten her fear. She was letting her feelings of passion take over completely…. until he began to place kisses down her neck. She was completely caught up in the moment, and totally unprepared for the fear that suddenly reached out and gripped her heart. She felt like something was squeezing her from the inside. She couldn't understand why this panic was overwhelming her… Sully began to slide her dress down her shoulder, and that's when she saw _him_. His face, it flashed before her eyes. It wasn't the face of her husband, the man she loved, it was the face of her attacker.

Sully could see the sudden panic in her eyes, and he moved his face away from hers quickly asking, "Michaela, what's wrong? Ya alright? Why do ya look so… so panicked?" he questioned.

_No, no this can't be happening. I said that this fear, that attack, it wasn't going to ruin my life. Our wedding. This night. No, No. No. _"I just…Sully… I'm sorry… I," she stammered.

"What? Michaela please tell me…" he questioned lovingly.

"It's just…. When you… I can see his face…" she began as tears fell onto her cheeks.

He sat up quickly running his hand through his hair. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry," the realization quickly dawned on him. "I didn't… I mean we haven't talked about it since that night on your porch a week ago. I thought ya were… okay. That was stupid, course ya aren't okay. How could ya be okay? I'm sorry I just got carried away…" he explained ashamed of himself.

"You don't have to be sorry. I'm the one that's sorry. I've completely ruined this for you. I know how much you were looking forward to tonight. How much I… I was looking forward…" she said the last sentence so softly he almost didn't hear it.

"You were looking forward to it, too?" he was completely stuck on that one sentence.

"Well of course," she smiled shyly still fighting back tears. "And now I've ruined it," she cried.

"Come here," he smiled pulling her into his embrace. "You didn't ruin nothin'. If ya aren't ready, ya aren't ready. I can wait. I like knowin' though, that you are lookin' forward to it too. It's okay, really. I can still hold ya right? That don't scare ya does it?" he questioned.

"No, not at all," she said chocking back sobs.

"Good," he smiled back at her. "Michaela it's just one night. One night out of a lifetime of nights. Ya let me know when you are ready. I meant what I said when I told ya we would take it ever so easy…" he explained. "Don't worry," he wiped a tear from the corner of her eye.

"You can kiss me too, you know," she smiled somewhat playfully.

"Oh really now?" he smiled and she giggled slightly. "There that's what I like ta see. That sparkle in ya eye, that smile on your face, that's all I need ta be happy," he stated.

"I love you," she responded simply. "You really are perfect."

"Well I don't know about all of that, but I think ya are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. And I love you too," he answered as he kissed her cheek and pulled her into a close embrace.


	7. Chapter 7

**Ch.7**

The week in Denver went by quickly much to both Sully and Michaela's disappointment. Although both were enjoying themselves, they still hadn't been _together_ as a couple. Sully still had not gained enough courage to try again. He didn't wait to make her uncomfortable, or make her feel that he was pressuring her in any way. He really did mean what he said when he told her he would wait. He was sure of that.

They had just returned from dinner and as he closed the door behind them, he reached for her cheek gently cupping it in his hand. He pulled her in for a deep, passionate kiss that quickly spiraled out of control. As she opened her mouth up to him, he quickly began to want more. More of her. He knew she wasn't ready, but he still wanted it. Slowly she pulled back.

"Sully. I love you so much. I want… I want…" She wanted to tell him that she wanted him to make love to her. She wanted to feel him inside of her. She wanted to know what it was like to feel his love. To experience what it was really like… She didn't know how to begin to get the words out.

"You want more?" he replied.

_How does he always know what I'm thinking? How does he read me so well? I can't find the words to say it, but somehow he still knows. _

"Yes…. I want _you_."

The way she said the word _you, _he knew exactly what she meant._ She was ready. Or at least she thought she was ready_.

He quickly pulled her back to him and their lips met. Slowly their kiss deepened as he guided them over to the bed.

_Okay she said she was ready for more…_

He slowly began to unbutton her shirt. His hand reached up to caress her shoulder as he slowly pushed the strap from her camisole further and further down. His hand began to slowly and gently caress her left breast.

_Oh God… not again. Please make it stop. I can feel his hands. See his face. It's not him. I just have to ignore it. I have to get passed this. _She repeated to herself over and over. _It's Sully. I love him and he loves me. This is so much different then that night. _

Even as she heard the words spiraling around in her head she still saw him when she looked into Sully's eyes_. _Instead of the soft, blue eyes in front of her all she could see were the cold, brown, unfeeling ones of her attacker. She swiftly pushed his hand away.

"Sully… I'm sorry… I" she began unsure what to say.

His heart sank to the floor. He had no idea what to say, what to do. He had pushed her too far. _You knew she wasn't ready. She told you she was, so you gave in thinking she would know better than you. How far will this set us back?_

He saw the tears running down her cheeks and he quickly averted his eyes.

"I'm so… I'm so sorry. I just don't know…" she began again.

He quickly looked back to her eyes to see more terror and fear than he had ever thought possible. _I caused that pain. I made her relive that night… I made her feel this way…_

"No Michaela, I'm sorry," he quickly moved off of her and lay facing her side.

"I shouldn't have pushed ya. I knew ya weren't ready for this. And ya don't have ta feel bad about nothin'. I love ya for tryin'. I'm just sorry I caused you so much pain," he spoke.

"No, I'm sorry. I just thought… I don't know. I guess I thought that the love would fix it…would fix everything…" she whispered under her breath.

"Michaela, love will help ya heal. But it takes time. And I've told ya, I don't expect nothin' from ya. I can wait. I can wait forever if ya need me to. I've told ya before my heart is yours now. Nothin' goin ta change that," he replied his words dripping with honesty.

"Sully… hold me." She whispered.

He slowly took her into his arms holding her tightly against his chest. With her head resting against his shoulder he was reminded of the last time she had spoke those very words on a cliff many months ago. It seemed like an eternity. _If only we could go back to that day.. If only I could change what happened. But I can't. I can only deal with what has happened and try to help her. Just wish I knew how. _ Those thoughts circled through his mind as the two drifted off to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Ch.8 **

They soon returned to Colorado Springs, moved into the new homestead, and began their life together. It was definitely an adjustment for both Michaela and Sully, but both loved their new roles as husband and wife.

Michaela sat in the clinic deep in thought. She couldn't help but feel terrible. She knew it was entirely her fault that they hadn't been_ together _as husband and wife_. I'm an awful wife. That's all there is to it. Mother told me it was a "wifely duty" for a reason. Neglecting it is simply not acceptable. Imagine what she would say if she knew I had pushed him away not once but twice? And on the night of our wedding? She would definitely let me know what a horrible person I am. _

_I wish there was a way that I could move past this. I wish I could stop picturing him every time Sully and I are together. After all Hank has made it abundantly clear that intruder is no longer a threat. I just don't know why I'm so afraid. After all Sully got there in time, so why is this still haunting me? Why can't I get it out of my mind?_

Just then there was a knock on the clinic door. "Come in," she replied.

"Hey beautiful," he spoke.

"Hey," she smiled from ear to ear.

"Wanted ta know if ya wanted to go to Grace's for some pie?" Sully questioned.

"Yeah, pie would be nice," she stood walking across the room to meet him.

"I've missed you," she stated.

He bent down capturing her lips as he brought her into a close embrace. "I've missed ya too," he spoke as he looked deeply into her eyes.

She could see the passion behind them… the desire. It just made her hate herself even more. _It's only a matter of time before he gives up on waiting for you… you can't make him wait for you forever… There's a reason it's called a wifely duty. It's your responsibility as a wife to let him have you… _

"Michaela you okay?" he wondered aloud.

"Oh, yes. Sorry, just lost in thought," she answered still in a trance.

"Good thoughts I hope? Thoughts of me?" he smiled.

"Yeah, good thoughts," she replied still distant.

He could tell something was bothering her. "Ya want to tell me what's been bothering ya?" he questioned.

"Bothering? No, nothing is bothering me. Let's go get some pie." She left his embrace pulling him towards the door.

Both were seated at Grace's enjoying each other's company as Hank approached their table.

"Sully how's your wife doin'? Glad I saved her, so ya could sit here and enjoy Grace's cookin' with her?" he asked.

Michaela looked away refusing to meet his eyes. Ever since that night almost a month ago, she hadn't been able to look him in the eye. She wasn't really sure what Sully had told him. She knew he couldn't have known many of the details, or they would have been spread all over town like wildfire a long time ago. But that still didn't change the fact that he made her uncomfortable. It was almost as if he knew there was a part of the story Sully had left out.

"What do ya want Hank? Anythin' or are you just here to bother everyone?" Sully replied in a mocking tone.

"Just wanted to know how the newlyweds were doin'. Wanted ta know how much _fun_ you've been havin'. Wanna hear all about it," he retorted while winking at Sully.

_Oh god, why did he say that? Why did he say it that way? Does he know something?_ She made eye contact with Sully, eyes filled with panic.

He knew what she was thinking. Why did Hank live for driving him out of his mind? He looked into her eyes and almost imperceptivity shook his head, and then turned to Hank.

"I'm not goin' ta ask ya again. If you don't want anythin' important than leave now," he spoke angrily.

"Okay. Okay. I'm goin'. Enjoy your pie _Michaela_. After all you picked it out didn't ya? Might not look great on the outside, but I'm sure it tastes good on the inside…" Hank spoke teasingly.

Sully began to rise from the table in an angry rage. "I'm goin'. I'm goin'. Ya can sit back down," Hank laughed as we walked back towards the saloon.

Once Hank had left Sully cupped her chin in his hand, lifting it up so he could look into her eyes. "Michaela," he whispered, "He don't know nothin'. Swear to you he doesn't. I didn't tell him nothin'," he explained hoping she would understand it was simply Hank being Hank.

"I know," she replied her head still hung.

"Then, what's wrong?" he wanted to know.

"He doesn't know how wrong he really is…" she whispered once again looking away from Sully. "I've got to get back to the clinic. See you tonight," she spoke leaving him to watch her walk away.


	9. Chapter 9

**Ch.9**

Sully began to creep up the stairs having gone down to retrieve more firewood. As he walked into their bedroom, he saw her standing in front of the mirror. He quickly set the firewood down, and crept up behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and placed a kiss on her shoulder where his chin would soon rest. "You are so beautiful, you know that?" he spoke gently.

She smiled unsure of how to respond. She placed her hands lovingly on top of his as he began to move his thumbs in small circles across her abdomen.

"You still frettin' about what Hank said this afternoon?" he wanted to know.

"No…. That's not it…" she hadn't given that conversation a second thought after returning to the clinic.

"Then, what's going on? Please be honest with me, Michaela. It's just you and me here. That's all I ask, is your honesty," he answered in a genuine tone turning her around to face him.

"I just… Well… I can't help but wish things were different… between the two of us…" she whispered.

"Different? Different how?" he wondered.

"Closer…"she ventured.

"Oh, okay _closer_," he smiled seductively. "You sure you want to try this again?" he asked needing more verbal confirmation. He remembered the last two times, and how difficult it had been to stop. This time he knew it would be almost impossible.

"Yes… I really do want to be with you…" she uttered as she bit her lower lip and looked into his eyes.

"You sure you are ready this time?" he asked. He wanted to make sure he received more of a verbal response this time around.

"Yes," she spoke genuinely as she placed her hand gently onto his chest.

That was all Sully needed to know, and he pulled her into him as he kissed her with all of the love and passion in his heart. He quickly began to loose control again as the fire between them burned brighter than ever. He lead her back to the bed, as their passion accelerated and his hands roamed her body.

He slowly began to undo the buttons of her shirt. He was reminded of the last time he had tried this and where it had ended. He quickly reminded himself to stay in this moment. This moment in time was what mattered not the past.

As their kisses became more laced with passion, he slowly removed her camisole sending it to the floor to rest with her shirt. He could feel her desire for him building with each kiss, and he began to slowly and gently caress her breasts. This time however she didn't pull away. As his hands roamed her upper body, their kisses became more passionate by the second. He knew that he should slow things down a little; make sure she was still okay. But it was becoming harder and harder to contain himself. He had wanted to touch her for so long. They had tried so many times before, and she had never felt this comfortable for this long. He knew he was risking it, but he had to take a chance. Every male bone in his body was telling him to go for it and not worry about the potential consequences. He quickly removed his clothing, tossing it to the side.

He slowly began to unbutton her skirt. He slide the dark blue material down her thighs, still Michaela didn't resist him. He reached for the waistband of her bloomers, and he felt her tense up beneath him, but he kept going. _She's tell me if it's too much… If I don't push her walls down a little every time she will never let them fall…_ He slowly slid them down her legs and placed his hand between her thighs.

As he began to move his hand closer to her center, she felt him hard against her thigh. That did it. That was it. _She had finally been able to let him touch her… look at her… see her… but no feeling him it was just too much… Last time she had felt a man against her thigh, he had almost taken something almost more precious to her than life itself… her innocence._

Sully looked up into her eyes and saw her start to cry. These weren't the soft silent tears from two weeks previous; no these were full-blown tears of panic. She began to breath heavily and sob uncontrollably. He immediately pulled his hand back afraid he had done irreparable damage.

"Michaela it's okay… It's okay.." He spoke soothingly trying anything to make her stop.

_I don't know how to calm her down he thought. I can't touch her that will only make it worse._ He quickly rolled off of her and sat beside her on the bed. She averted her eyes from his quickly looking to the floor. She pulled the blanket from the corner of the bed over to her, huddling underneath it. He helped her wrap the blanket around her, and then took her face in his hand turning it to look into her eyes.

"Michaela ya have ta let me in. I can't help ya… I can't be with ya… if ya don't let me in. I know I will never understand how hard this is for ya' but ya' got ta tell me. I promise I will try ta understand. But I can't when ya don't talk ta me. I get that I pushed ya too far again and I'm sorry. Sometimes I just don't know what ta do. Ya tell me ya want me, and ya show me that it's okay to go further. Then, in one moment ya are in a panic. I don't know what to do. I really don't. Talk ta me, please," he desperately pleaded.

"I'm sorry it's just so hard…. You know this isn't something I ever felt comfortable discussing. Even before all of this happened," she sobbed.

"I was always taught that this is not something that wives are supposed to discuss with their husbands. And every time I want to try to talk to you about it, I just feel ashamed… Ashamed that we even have to discuss it at all. I should be stronger than this. I should be a better wife to you and let you love me. I can't help but feel like there is something wrong with me. You saved me. He didn't take me like he wanted to, like he was going to. I should be okay with this," she cried.

"Michaela, ya have nothin' ta be ashamed about. I've told ya that before. Ya are the strongest person I know. It takes a special person ta try and open themselves up again like ya have tried to for the third time now. He hurt you, Michaela. Maybe not physically, but he hurt ya just the same. At the time ya didn't know I was going to make it in time. Ya didn't know I was going to save ya. So now every time we get close to that point…" he started, realization kicking in.

"Yes I'm reminded of the fact that you almost weren't there to save me… He almost took me Sully. He almost took the most valuable gift I have to give you. The gift I have still yet to give you… If you had been second later…" she started.

"Yeah, but I wasn't seconds later and that's what matters. I made it. And even if I hadn't made it, it wouldn't a changed nothin'. It wouldn't have changed the way I feel about ya. And ya are wrong Michaela. The most valuable gift you have to give me is not your innocence; it's your heart. And ya already gave that ta me a long time ago. Now tell me what exactly did I do that brought back the fear?" Ya seemed fine and then the panic hit ya. So what did I do? Do ya know when you first started to feel that way? Maybe if we figure that out I can help ya be less afraid. Remember I ain't him Michaela. I ain't makin' ya do this. Ya can stop me any time ya want to. We are doin' this cause ya love me and ya want to feel this." he stated.

_Okay, what exactly was it that brought on the panic? What made that deep fear built inside and rise in a lump in my throat. It wasn't when he touched me… It was when… It was when I felt him…_

Blushing profusely she started to say, "It was when you well you…" she stopped obviously embarrassed.

"Come on, please tell me. There's nothin' ya can't tell me. Please I really think it will help," he encouraged.

"It was when I felt you" the words came out in a quick rush as she turned an even deeper shade of red.

"You mean when you felt me, against you, down there?" he stammered.

This conversation was getting uncomfortable even for Sully, but he knew this was the way to really break her down. She would never get this out again unless he forced her to discuss it now. As uncomfortable as he was, he knew it was much much harder for her. Not just because of her Boston upbringing, but because she was the one exposing her fears… exposing herself.

"Okay…"he began. _Where to go from here?_ "Why did that scare ya? Cause it reminded ya of that night, of him? Or because ya are scared of what it means? Of what's goin' ta happen because of it?" he questioned.

"Both," she replied quickly.

It dawned on Sully that maybe the most fighting part had nothing to do with that night. Maybe that night had really just escalated fears that she already had about their wedding night, about being with him. It was no secret that Michaela wasn't exactly comfortable with physical intimacy. It had taken a long time for her to feel comfortable expressing herself to him, and just when she had begun to open up to him, right before Washita, it all came crashing down the night of the attack.

An idea quickly dawned on Sully. "What if you were the one in control?" he wondered aloud.

"What?" she quickly replied. This wasn't making any sense.

"What if I told ya what to do? What if you had the power over me?" he asked.

She didn't understand him. She didn't know a lot about physical intimacy or lovemaking, but with what she did know this wasn't making any sense. "I don't understand," she stammered.

He quickly grabbed her left hand and placed it on his manhood. "Ya are in control Michaela. Don't be scared. You show me what you are ready for. When you are ready for me, show me, guide me…" he stated.

"I don't… I don't know how… this is too hard…" she whispered shyly.

"No, ya are thinking too much. Just feel. Feel me beneath your hand. What does your heart tell ya to do Michaela? What feels right?" he questioned her once again.

_What feels right? I don't know what feels right_. Slowly she began to caress his manhood; imitating his touches from before that had made her feel his passion.

"See," he sighed. "I knew you would know what ta do if ya just felt it." He grabbed her and pulled her on top of him. As she stroked his length, he let out a shuddery moan. With his verbal expression she began to feel bolder and started to trail kisses across his chest and stomach.

He could barely utter the next sentence. Her touch was making him lose all control. "When your ready take my hand… show me you are ready…" he groaned aloud.

_She picked up his left hand and placed it on her inner thigh. You can do this. Just feel. Don't think. Feel. He wants you to let go and let him love you. But even he said it, you are LETTING him love you. He's not forcing this on you._

She shyly guided his hand towards her center, as he looked into her eyes with a reassuring stare. As he stroked her, she began to feel the waves of pleasure emanating from her core. It only intensified as he slid one, then two fingers inside of her. As his left hand worked her lower body, his right hand brought her pleasure above as he gently caressed her breasts.

She was starting to feel out of control. She wasn't sure if she liked feeling out of control. Sully was right, that was probably what scared her the most about all of this. At the same time this feeling of being out of control was like no other. It wasn't really out of control; after all she was in the hands of Sully. The only place she ever felt safe and secure. The only person she knew would never hurt her.

When he knew she was ready for him, he looked up into her eyes and whispered, "Are ya ready?"

She smiled back down at him nodding, and he slowly flipped her off of him back onto the mattress. He slowly, and gently climbed onto her, positioning himself. "You sure you are ready? Remember I do what you say," he stated.

"Yes… please Sully," she stuttered. It was so hard to get words out, to focus.

"Yeah?" he questioned again.

"I need you…" she replied. She let out a small groan as he entered her. As he breached her innocence, he could see it in her eyes. Pain. It was there, and he couldn't help but panic a little._ Pain. I hope that doesn't turn quickly to fear or to panic._

"Ya okay? He quickly asked. Although she had felt a sharp wave of pain it was quickly dissipating and instead was replaced with a sensation similar to the one Sully had given her moments earlier. This time, however, it was much stronger.

"Yeah. I'm okay. I love you so much," she gasped.

"I love ya too," he stammered as he began to slowly thrust in an out of her.

As she began to feel overwhelmed by physical and emotional intensity, she pulled him closer, bending her knees at his hips, allowing him to move in deeper. He smiled down at her knowing she had really listened to him when he told her to do what felt right. He thrust in and out at the right speed and angle to push her over the edge, as he kissed her neck and nipped at her earlobe. He felt her falling, as the shooting sensations pulsed through their bodies. She bit her lower lip to keep from crying out as she threw her head back, moaning as she rode through the waves of pleasure. As she flew into ecstasy, he felt himself loosing control. He quickly followed, shuddering as he moaned her name.

As they both came down from their highs, he laid on her chest spent, but not wanting to leave her so soon. He looked down into her beautiful sparkling eyes, and he knew it had meant as much to her as it had to him. He softly began to place kisses across her jaw and down her neck. She ran her hand through his soft locks moaning softly. He rolled to her side pulling her close to him.

"I love ya more than words can say. I'm so glad ya finally let me in," he whispered. He placed his hand over her heart feeling it beating quickly. It's pace slowly returning to normal.

"I can never thank ya enough for what you've done for me. I know how hard it was for ya to get past this, ta let me in," he explained his eyes radiating with love.

She likewise, placed her hand across his heart. "I'm so glad that I did. That was… I just… I never thought it could be like that… I never thought that my love for you would make me feel that way. Thank you, Sully. Thank you for never giving up on me in life and in love," she said a tear forming in the corner of her eye.

Reaching up to wipe her cheek he replied, "I will never give up on ya, Michaela. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with ya. Lovin' ya and holdin' ya. I don't ever want ta leave your side."

"Then, don't," she stated simply.

"Sully… hold me." This time her simple statement was laced with desire and love instead of fear and anxiety. It was the same way she had spoken it the very first time on a cliff almost another lifetime ago. He fell asleep with her in his arms knowing he would love her for the rest of his days.

The End


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